Second Pregancy: Week 9

At the beginnign of last week, i was starting to feel slightly better. I was gagging a little less throughout the day but everything else remained hard. On wednesday night, we needed to pack to go to amsterdam the next day and for some reason, maybe it was even the thought of having to go somewhere, or maybe there really was something wrong, i ended up feeling so sick that night and puked in the middle of the night and early morning. We made our way to the 10am train at gare du nord with not much fanfare thankfully and arrived there in tact. In fact, i was so super hungry by the time we got there that we bought five guys and i ate an entire small hamburger, some fries, and some shake! My brother arrived that evening and on friday and saturday, although i was not feeling great, i pushed myself to hang out with them. However, by Saturday night, after a long dinner and a nauseous train ride, i puked that night, and then the following day, three times. I ended up staying back at the apartment all of sunday, unable to do anything.

Monday was the day we were leaving and needed to clean up the whole apartment, but caleb had left and there was a lot to be done. My mom did 99% of the all the cleaning partly because i was feeling really terribly and partly just because i am a terrible daughter. i did the laundry and then we rushed ourselves to the trainstation. Unfortunately, during the rush, i broke out not only in terrible hives on my entire body, but was hit with angiodema. Nonstop sneezing, eyes and face swollen like a balloon. On the train, i just wanted to take all my clothes off and scratch scratch scratch. After 2x 10mg of cetirizine, i passed out the entire rest of the trip dizzy and tired. My mom looked after callan the entire time.

By the time we arrived home, i dont think i have ever felt this tired. i just layed on the couch and could not move and could not do anything. i was feel so nauseous. i went to bed early and slept for almost 10 hours and this morning, i was still nauseous. For the first time, i didnt make it to the bathroom in time for the puking and puked into my hands and leaked onto the floor. pretty damn gross.

Right now, i am feeling okay. the rock in my stomach seemed to have grown smaller and im jst a little bit nauseous. What is really bothering me this pregnancy is really all the smell. every smell gets to me. I can't even use my usual brand of Keri lotion now. i switched to scentless lotion that i can still smell. I cant wait until this is all over. Friday is my first appointment with the gynecologist. i am looking forward to hearing some confirmation on the pregnancy. i feel like it's always kinda weird before 12 weeks or before you actually hear the heartbeat because although you have high beta HCG to confirm the pregnancy, anythign could really happen until then, and it's nice to just hear someone confirm that there's a blueberry in your tummy that has a thumping heart.