The fact is, most of the people in this program are young. By young, I mean, 2nd-4th year university students, an average of 18-21 year olds. Not to say that there aren't a large numer of 22 and 23 year olds, but 25 is damn old.
What was I like when I was 20? Naive, immature, unaware, blamed others for things that didn't go my way, unappreciative of all the wonderful turn of events that has been endowed upon me for no reason at all.
What am I like as a 25 year old? Less naive, less immature, more wary, attempt to figure out what I did wrong for things to go badly, growing appreciation for just how lucky I am to be where I am today.
What was I not like when I was 20? Believing that I am better than Taiwanese people who grew up in Taiwan because I happen to grow up in some other place. Lack of thirst and drive to learn about things around me, thinking that it's okay to be ignorant.
That is almost all.
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I kind of want to believe that at 27 years old I have matured a lot more and became a better person. But I think there is a part of me that's still the same as the old me, I probably just hide it better. I almost feel like I pretend I am more mature because I have to be, and I am a better person because I am supposed to be. But secretly I think there's still a part of me that wants to be this very selfish girl who wants things to always go away. But I think at 27 years old I realized that you can't have everything go your way, life just isn't like that. A bit of a cruel realization I guess.
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