ABC

Two years ago, not too long after I moved to Boston, through some connection, Adam asked me if I was interested in going to an Ivy League game involving Harvard vs. Cornell. The tickets were going to be bought through a group of Taiwanese-Americans who are organizing the event to cheer on a Taiwanese-American player named Jeremy Lin, who has the potential to be drafted into the NBA. It was a fun event, and one of the girls made a large sign for JLin and as posers, we took pics with it. I have a whole facebook album of the event and some close-up pics of JLin on court, as well as me being interviewed by Taiwanese media on the JLin phenomenon. Even at that point, the Taiwanese media was on top of it, ready to claim him to be the pride and joy of our "country."

It actually occurred to me at that point, I can't remember whether it was a conversation of some sort or I read this somewhere, that a lot of the people that I went to the game with, and Jeremy Lin himself, would correct you when you call them Taiwanese. "Actually, my parents are Taiwanese. I was born in America." They never directly say that they are NOT Taiwanese, nor do they say that they are Taiwanese-American; rather, they point out simply that it is their parents who are Taiwanese. If you were to ask them what their background is, they'd say "well my parents are born in Taiwan, but I'm born in the U.S." --there is simply no label for them.

First, it's important to point out that they are not wrong. I mean, it's a fact that they are born in the U.S., therefore Americans--there's no dispute about it. The question is what it even means to be Taiwanese-American. When someone says a person is African-American, it doesn't mean that the person is from Africa, it simply indicates a race in a politically correct yet in a somewhat distorted way--if you're black and your parents are from Jamaica, are you African-American? But then you never hear people refer someone as "Jamaican-American", though you do hear things like Irish-American, and yet not "Italian-American" (politically anyway). I don't understand this hyphenate American thing enough to have an understanding of when does one get a alternate attachment because it's not just purely "continent-American", "country-American", or in the Chinese case, simply "race-American"---or is it? Does being Chinese-American imply that you're from China or does it imply that your parents are of the "Chinese" race? Is Chinese even a race? Wikipedia tells me that there is no real clear definition from a social construction of different Asian races (Indians are Asians too and Korean is not a race.) So is JLin Taiwanese-American or Chinese-American? Even ESPN couldn't figure it out. At the Vday game last night against the Raptors, the commentator said, "he is the first Taiwanese....er Chinese American...."

Taiwan is neither a race nor a UN recognized country, so Jlin, not having been born in Taiwan, never having visited Taiwan until last year, and not speaking Mandarin well, how can he identify with being "Taiwanese-American"? The easy way out is for him to say he's "Chinese-American" to identify his race as being simply not white or black because, you know, if you claim to be just plainly American, you get white people saying, well of Asian descent, and Chinese people saying, oh you're not proud of your ancestor. On the other hand, if you are anywhere beyond second generation American and white, then you have an easier time not to have to associate yourself with a culture and identity you simply don't identify with. Basically, the point is, if your skin looks anything Asian, to say you're simply "American" is ludicrous in everyone else's eyes.

Interestingly, if you look at all the Canadian-born Asians or whatever other race or country their parents are from, you have no identity problems. All my Canadian-born Chinese friends have no problems saying they're simply Chinese. If anyone I know are asked "what's your background?" It'd be quite simple--- "Chinese" "Korean" "Taiwanese" "Guyanese" "Ukrainian." So put simply, this identity issue is purely an American ideological and assimilation issue, details of which I simply don't have enough interest at the moment to get into.

The second, and probably most important thing I want to point out is the lack of understanding Taiwanese people, and even other Chinese people, seem to have about the American assimilation process. They feel like JLin is Taiwanese or Chinese and they boast about it. Sure you have people everywhere talking about JLin as a phenomenon no matter where you turn your head, but these Taiwanese and Chinese people take it a step further and say that he represents them(!) Let me tell you right here and right now, I've seen his interviews and he does not feel that he's representing anyone, especially not those living on this little island called Taiwan. Every time he gets asked questions like "how does it feel to represent such a large group of people" he skirts around the issue and says things like, well it's my parents who are Taiwanese and I'm just playing ball. The funniest thing is when the Taiwanese politicians want to recruit him to play for the Taiwanese national league--good luck with that. Will Lin's attitude change when he has more interactions with Asian/Chinese/Taiwanese culture and fans? Who knows, but to go around claiming that he's Taiwanese and the "Light of Taiwan" is almost embarrassing. Like one commentator said, you don't see Africans claiming Kobe is the "Light of Africa".

Personally, as someone who is Taiwan-born with a lot of Taiwanese influence as I grew up, my initial reaction to JLin's readiness to shake off his background was a bit of a disappointment. But then as I thought about it, I realized that if he was born and raised in the U.S., and he has never been to Taiwan, and his parents never enforced traditional Asian values on him, why should anyone expect him to be otherwise? Someone said to me that it's his parents' "fault" for the way he is...Why is it a fault to allow your children to live in an environment that's like everyone else's? This idea of having a responsibility to get to know your roots is antiquated and unfair. The more you understand about ANY culture will make you a better person. It is a humanistic responsibility to learn about other cultures, but it is not anyone's responsibility to zone in on a single culture because someone else tells you based on your parents' background and your skin colour that you should get to know something.

Most importantly, JLin's attitude is not disgust towards his background or that he's not proud. He makes very valid points about his background without looking down on anything. Had he went around saying he's Taiwanese, I guarantee you we'd get haters who say JLin is as Taiwanese as Kobe Bryant because he can barely even speak Mandarin and has never been to Taiwan. You can't win. On the other side of the same coin, people who go around saying "I'm proud to be Asian" "Asian Pride" blah blah blah, but know nothing about his or her culture is a lot more appalling to me. Do you even know what you're proud of?

Regardless of where you are born, where your parents are born,where you grew up, where they grew up, the most important thing is about your identity shouldn't be something as superficial as your skin colour and things you can't change, but about being honest with yourself and being a good human being. Be proud of the fact that you have done good things in your life, and not just tout that you're proud of something you can't even control or don't even understand.

Idealistic? Probably. But we gotta start somewhere.

Grammy 2012

Love it:




Hate it:



On the Fence:

You're Not Like Other Girls

The other night, I watched Sex and the City 2 from the DVD I ordered from NetFlix. The movie was horrible... I mean I watched the entire run of SatC and loved the show, I even watched the first movie and rather enjoyed it, but this second one just dragged on and on and on without any plot. Every guy character that had some important relationship with the girls from the show had a tiny stint in the movie without a full storyline and yet there are a bunch of plot fillers like some old famous woman performing the ENTIRE "All the Single Ladies" dance routine.

But I digress, as the point of this post is not a review of the movie, but about a very singular part of the theme of the movie. Admittedly, it appears that when making this movie, the producers seemed to have realized that they don't have a very strong plot, so they will have to sell it by luring women with all the ideals in life a woman wants achieve, though pragmatically unattainable. This includes:

• A closet that looks like this:
  
• with the rest of the apartment looking like this (in NYC of course, and this image doesn't include their gigantic kitchen:
  
  
  
  
• a husband with a name like "John James Preston" who is a financial tycoon, tall, handsome good looking, and just wants to stay home and cuddle with the wife (i.e., Mr. Big in the movie)
• an ex-boyfriend like Aiden, who is sexy, fun, laid-back, travels around the world and is still in love with you even though he's married and have three kids
• a group of girlfriends who can drop everything in their rich and busy lives at three week's notice to go to Abu Dhabi with you.
• Have a career that allows you to have flexible schedule, including two published books and freelance for Vogue
• Go to your gay best friend's wedding and have people go up to you and tell you how much they admire you
• Dress up glamourously everyday even when you've been at home all day
• Dress up even more glamourously for the evening, when you got to a huge Hollywood premier
• Have both the men your life (husband and ex who is still in love with you) tell you that you're not "like any other girl"

Of course, the list goes on, but I stop here because this was something that really resonated with me.

In the movie, Carrie runs into Aiden at Abu Dhabi, and she goes out to dinner with him, and while chatting, they have a moment and Aiden looks into her eyes and says, "you're not like any other girl", and ten minutes later, though he loves his wife and kids, Aiden cheated on them by kissing Carrie. Mr. Big, after finding out that she has kissed Aiden, decided to buy her a huge black diamond ring when she got home from Abu Dhabi to remind her that she is married.

"Why black?" She asks.
"Because you're not like any other girl," he replies.

Beyond the fact that Mr. Big did something so fairy-tale like that this story-line really belongs in Twilight (zone, too, if you will, pun intended), what really behooves me is that Carrie appears to be just like any other girl, and when she does deviate from being like every other girl, it's a trait that no men want.

• she spent her life chasing after Big and wanted to tie him down
• she doesn't know anything about the world, doesnt care about anything in the world besides her shoes and her clothes, and can't have a conversation with Aiden about worldly matters
• she doesnt cook, at all, because, she tells Big, "you knew that I'm not that type of girl when you met me"
• she drags her husband out after a long day of work to a hollywood premier that he doesn't want to go to and gets upset cuz he's flirting with Penelope Cruz
• she goes to Abu Dhabi and makes out with her ex-boyfriend because Big hurt her feelings

I'm not saying that Carrie's character in this movie has no redeeming qualities, but to say that she is not like any other girl would be a bit of a dramatic stretch. Similarly, every time I hear a girl say that they don't think they are like other girls, it's usually a gross generalization on their part where they have specific traits that don't align with social expectations of female roles.

What Carrie embodies here is a fulfilled desire where some of her traits deviates from the social expectations of how a girl should behave, and therefore she is desired by men (there is, of course, some general sexism going on here that I won't get into).

The reality is, to have this desire is completely normal, and to some extent, benign. Women don't want to be like every other women because it would make them special. Who doesn't want to be special? Every girl wants to hear that they are not like anyone else and that they are special.

So in this case, what makes one special? Should you have to work on being special? There is definitely something to be appreciated when women are able to do extraordinary things in life, such as become the first female president or abandon their common life and perform charity work with people that need help. But plain janes like us, what can we do to make us special?

I have met people who go out of their way to be unique. Unfortunately, some who trash other girls and say they are nothing like the regular girl. I have also met girls who do illogical things to get attention and make them stand out from the crowd.

Should you have to try to be special and unique? Or is everyone already special and unique in their own ways?

And here, I think, is an interesting lesson from SatC2. There is nothing special about Carrie in this movie, in relations to the girls in the entire world. In fact, no one in the world would say that Carrie is a unique character (especially when most girls who watch SatC identifies with her). What Carrie does have though, are people whom she loves who also think that she is special....And isn't this what love is? To have people who love you appreciate you and find you to be unique for just being you, no matter how plain you really are.

And if we are still so inclined at working to become a different person, perhaps the thing to do is just to work at self-improvement, rather than work on being unique? Would that be more unique? Maybe that's why Carrie is special in the movie, because she is always self-reflecting and always trying to figure out what the right thing to do is?

Thank you Movember

for helping me realize that I find men with facial hair attractive.

Latest realization of turn-ons:

• facial hair
• nerds who are passionate about humanities (or any sort of field they can excel at--whether finances or technology, but especially humanities).

Already realized turn-ons:

• shaved head...not necessarily due to natural hair loss..haha
• witty, i.e., smart and funny

All-time biggest turn off:

• men who spend too much time on their appearance, including working out and dressing up.

UP

Regardless of how many times I watch up, I always bawl my eyes out at the opening sequence and the part where he goes through the Adventure book last time, and then let her go. My all-time favourite movie., though I always struggle before watching because I'm not sure if I want to suffer the emotional ordeal.

Cougar Alert

Yesterday, I posted the following on my FB:

Mike Zhang and I are trying to figure out who I should go for, Leonardo DiCaprio who is 8 years older than me, or Taylor Lautner who is 8 years younger than me. The real questions is, which one can I pull off better, dating an 18 year old or a 35 year old? Btw, Inception has rekindled my love for Leonardo DiCaprio. Gotta dig out my old posters from Romeo & Juliet and Titanic ♥

It garnered a lot of responses...mostly girls.

And then monica msged me today.

_________________________________________

- mun.:
lynnnnnnnnnnnnnie!
so did you decide
leo or talyor

Lynnie:
hahahahahahahahaha
whoever i can get!
i think taylor might be tired of all the old women drooling over him

Lynnie:
i just googled taylor lautner
his abs are....
i feel like a pedophile

- mun.:
hahahhahahahhah
DROOLS?
hahahha..
you must have saw this one
http://www.google.ca/imgres?imgurl=http://cdn.buzznet.com/media-cdn/jj1/headlines/2009/03/taylor-lautner-shirtless-abs.jpg&imgrefurl=http://justjared.buzznet.com/2009/03/19/ashley-greene-taylor-lautner%25E2%2580%2599s-shirtless-scenes/&h=300&w=300&sz=24&tbnid=YcGHK-pdvvqzTM:&tbnh=116&tbnw=116&prev=/images%3Fq%3Dtaylor%2Blautner&hl=en&usg=__4ME35vAu-9qGskws5JQ_ZXBG7ic=&sa=X&ei=-kNGTKaSJ9CKnQem09HiA
8 pack!
hahahhah

Lynnie:
i did! i asked adam if they were photoshopped
he said they were real

- mun.:
well
how do you tell
look kinda airbrushed in that pic

Lynnie:
thats what i was telling him
and i said makeup helps it get defined better
but then we looked at a few other ones
and he deemed them real
i'd like them to real
so im really not gonna refute that

Testing the i___

I'm currently on the adam's iPod touch using the app called blogwriter lite. I'm pretty impressed with this gadget. The iBook app is my favourite. I think if I had an iPhone I'd end using it 24-7 because I can do anything on this almost anywhere. Crazy. I'm still not a fan of the touchscreen keyboard though.

Inception is a must-see

Inception is not mind-blowing: the ideas are all too familiar, there is no profound or thought-provoking ideas.
Inception is not a challenging piece of puzzle: everything is explained before you need to figure anything out.

Inception is well-executed in story-telling, cinematography, special effects, music, casting: 3 levels of reality happening at the same time, haunting actors, beautiful scenes, and full 2.5 hours of tension, suspense, and dramatic music.

Inception is essentially a menage of classic greatness:
There is nothing new about the content, you can find all the ideas in many classic psychological sci-fi thriller, and, of course, Freud.
There is nothing new about the style; you can see shadows of the Matrix, Ccean's Eleven, James Bond, Blade Runner, 2001.

But it makes you feel like you're watching something completely new and original.

It is a good story that was told in a way that made it better.
It is a real "good movie"
It is what all movies ought to be.

If I had to say one bad thing about the movie, it would be that it was too packed with action--Non-stop from beginning to end--I'm not sure how my heart handled it.
But for some, that only makes the movie that much better.

Go see it.

I love Sandra Bullock

I adored Sandra Bullock's acceptance speech yesterday at the Oscars. It made me absolutely teary:

Did I really earn this or did I just wear you all down?

I would like to thank the Academy for allowing me in the last month to have the most incredible ride with rooms full of artists that I see tonight and that I’ve worked with before and I hope to work with in the future, who inspire me and blaze trails for us. Four of them that I’ve fallen deeply in love with I share this night with and I share this award with.

Gabby, I love you so much. You are exquisite. You are beyond words to me. Carey, your grace and your elegance and your beauty and your talent makes me sick. Helen, I feel like we are family through family and I don’t have the words to express just what I think of you. And Meryl, you know what I think of you and you are such a good kisser.

I have so many people to thank for my good fortune in this lifetime and this is a once-in-a-lifetime experience, I know.

To the family that allowed me to play them, the Tuohy family, I know they’re in here and you’ll probably hear her in a minute......Maybe not. Thank you for giving me the opportunity to…

The family that made this film that gave me the opportunity to do something different. John Lee Hancock, Gil Netter, Alcon, Warner Bros., the actors, everyone who’s shown me kindness when it wasn’t fashionable, I thank you.

To everyone who was mean to me when it wasn’t… George Clooney threw me in a pool years ago. I’m still holding a grudge.

But there’s so many people to thank....not enough time, so I would like to thank what this film is about for me which are the moms that take care of the babies and the children no matter where they come from. Those moms and parents never get thanked. I, in particular, failed to thank one. So…

If I can take this moment to thank Helga B. for not letting me ride in cars with boys until I was 18 because she was right. I would’ve done what she said I was gonna do. For making me practice every day when I got home. Piano, ballet, whatever it is I wanted to be. She said to be an artist, you had to practice every day, and for reminding her daughters that there’s no race, no religion, no class system, no color, nothing, no sexual orientation that makes us better than anyone else. We are all deserving of love. So, to that trailblazer, who allowed me to have that. And this. And this. I thank you so much for this opportunity that I share with these extraordinary women and my lover Meryl Streep. Thank you.”

Regardless of whether you liked her before this or not, her speech was all win: graceful, humble, and full of class. Not to mention she looked dazzling. Below is the clip, at least until YouTube removes it.

Facebook Privacy Settings - Summary

I've never been someone who cared that much about privacy. I make some attempts to exert control over what gets published on Facebook feeds (e.g., me making a comment on someone's picture does not get published on my news feed but who I just became with does.) Really, my attempt at privacy was never consistent. For a while, I unlisted myself from facebook public searches, and then placed myself back but blocked my photo, and then I decided to show my photo but take away all other info. I mean circumstance changes all the time and the key really is to make informed decisions--though in the past, I never really paid attention.

I remember when FB rolled out their mini feed and home feed and everyone can get stalked...that created a huge disgruntlement among users but I thought the feature was really cool...I mean if you dont want people to know then just don't do it right? Recently Facebook rolled out a huge new privacy change and I finally got around too seeing what new options they have given you and what have been taken away. To be honest, I was a little surprised.

Here is a list of superficial stuff that I think matters for the average joe who's scared their boss might find a pic of them drinking.

1. There is a list of publicly available information that you cannot hide if you allow your facebook link to show up as a search result (i.e., someone who searches for your name on google might see a link to your limited profile as a search result). This includes your profile pic (you used to be able to hide it) and pages you are a "fan" of (why is that even available to be seen?!). The only way to prevent this information from becoming available publicly is to delist yourself from the search results. If you did not previously hide your friends list , that will also show up in a public search.
2. You can no longer control what shows up on your mini news feed and wall--although your old settings are still in tact. Remember back in the day when the mini news feed first rolled out and there would be a time stamp next to your activities (e.g., Jan 1 10:15am Lynn is now friends with Adam Kiu)? At the time, you were able to control what gets to be published or not--Don't show timestamp, check; publish relationship status updates, uncheck. All of this is now gone. If you have chosen not to publish photos being tagged of you, you can no longer make it show. If you have chosen to publish them, you cannot make them disappear. On top of that, the news feed also shows that you "liked" something and you can't make it stop.
3. If you want to hide your friend's list from your profile, you can...sort of. You can have your list of friends not show on your profile page but if you allow yourself to show up in public searches and did not previously hide your friends list, your friends list will still turn up when someone searches about you on google.
4. You can now block specific person/people from seeing particular status updates. If you want to stop someone from seeing a particular update, before you press the "Share" button, you can click on this little lock icon and block a specific person or a group of people from seeing that message (e.g., if I want to publish a video about Matt Chan that Matt told me not to publish, I can totally do that without Matt knowing.)

There are a couple of other small and big changes and behind the scene application-related privacy issues. The thing with privacy and worrying about third-party apps on facebook, imo, is that if you don't want your private information given to third-party software companies, then don't add third-party developed apps (like Tal) or just don't put any personal information about you on Facebook, hidden or not. Really, anything you put on the Internet can be compromised and be seen by anyone at some point so if you're that worried, just do put it on. It's all about calculated risk and what you value.

I'm pretty sure Facebook will have to change some of these issues soon, as they are still in a transitional period on privacy policies, as well as getting in trouble with the Federal Trade Commission (FTC) (The Electronic Privacy Information Center (EPIC) has called on the FTC to investigate the changes that it says mislead users and "contradict Facebook’s own representations."), so we'll see if the changes I documented will stay.

Anyway, if you want a more detailed look at what the new privacy transition can do to your
http://dotrights.org/what-does-facebooks-privacy-transition-mean-you

Smell, light, and sound of marketing

I bought a coat yesterday from Hollister and now I feel like justifying how I sold myself out, again. You know, I've been selling myself out a lot since going out with Adam...interesting...

The short version of the story is that I bought the coat because
1. The music at Hollister was not loud
2. The smell at Hollister was surprisingly non-existent
3. I could not see the coat in their lighting, so I had to buy it so I can try it on at home.


Here is the long version.
_____________
Adam and I went shopping yesterday (finally!!) and we decided to go to Cambridgeside Galleria, a relatively normal mall, reminiscent of Walden Galleria in Buffalo. Apparently, it's one of the better malls in Boston, though I find the selections lacking; perhaps I'm just missing the familiarity of the stores in Canada, and actually knowing which stores to go when I want a certain type of clothing.

Within the three floors of retail stores, Club Monaco, A&F, and Hollister were lined up side-by-side in the corner of the highest floor, with A&F in the middle. Now, to provide a context of my relationship with A&F and Hollister, let me tell you about my past experiences in these stores.

The first time I walked into an A&F and spent more than 30 seconds in the store was in was in NYC, at their 5th Ave. flagship store that was three or four stories high. I was with Jen and Andrew Ho, and some other people, whom, at this point I cannot remember. The group of us walked in and within a minute, I felt nauseated by the smell and the extremely loud music, and the very dark lighting. I got out of there fast. Andrew Ho trailed out after me after a few minutes and we decided we wanted to leave. However, after waiting outside for a long time, the rest of the group is still not out and none of us had US phones. So we went back in on a hunt that lasted for about 30 minutes. By the time we finally got out, I almost cried. This was about four years ago.

The second time I walked into A&F and stayed for more than 30 seconds was this summer, before I went back to Taiwan. Two years ago, when I went back to TW and gave my cousin some American Eagle clothing, she was disappointed that they were not from A&F. Apparently A&F is a status symbol and there are fakes everywhere in TW. So this time, I decided to get all my friends in TW A&F stuff. I was in there for about 15 minutes in search of the right and not too expensive stuff before I had to leave the premise and take a break for 10 minutes before I went back in for another 15 minutes to finish my purchases.

Yesterday, was my first time at Hollister.

Smell
To be fair, I headed for CM first. Funnily, CM smelled like A&F, you know, the smell of that cologne (apparently named "Fierce"), which the employees must spray on the clothes every 30 minutes to a few hours, according to this source and this source, and this source. It surprises me that people actually go and buy this cologne to spray on their own A&F clothing, but that's probably a discussion for another day. Adam and I were cracking up in CM because we felt so sorry for the employees of CM...they totally did not sign up to smell like A&F all day...or did they? Ironically, when we went into the Hollister store, expecting that scent to be stronger, the smell was actually not present AT ALL. (Btw, I just ran a search on the smell in Hollister because for a second there, I realized that I don't actually remember whether Hollister usually has a smell at all since I almost never walk into those stores and I always group the two stores together in my head so I don't actually know which store I'm in when I'm there. The results told me that I was not wrong and Hollister does do the same spray-on cologne deal, but the two stores apparently do not smell the same. Hollister uses the "Social" spray....) . I wonder what happened with the ventilation and management in these stores.

Music
Surprisingly, the music at Hollister was not exceptionally loud either. We had walked in A&F right after CM since I thought if we had to be forced to withstand the smell at CM anyway, we should just go into A&F. We were in there for five minutes (or less), checked out a coat that was on sale but left because I had no interest in buying an A&F item for myself. However, at Hollister, we saw that exact same coat for $20 less. Since there was not loud music and obnoxious scent, I actually stayed in the store and attempted to try it on! (On another note, Guess downstairs on the second floor had a DJ playing VERY loud music. The sales ppl were screaming at each other in order to have a conversation).

Lighting
So the coats were hanging on a rolling rack and there were different colours...unfortunately, Adam and I could not tell what those colours were. So I took out one of the darker colours and put it on, then attempting to look for a mirror, to no avail. Naively believing that we would be able to find a mirror with better lighting at the fitting room, we took a dark and a light colour coat towards the direction. Outside of the fitting room, we found a full-length mirror, without any lighting AT ALL. What is the point of having a mirror you can't see?!?!?! The fitting room girl came and asked us if we wanted a room, and I asked her if there was lighting in there. She laughed and said yes so we got a room. Well, it turned out that the lighting in there was rather dim still and after walking toward and away from the mirror a few times, we were finally able to see that the dark colourwas brown and the light colour was maybe a beigey colour (it could be white actually, who knows). Adam thought the jacket was nice, I wasn't sure since I can't really tell in the dark, so we decided to buy it so we can take it home and actually see the fit and the style. (so that's their marketing scheme!).

Completing the Sale
Ironically, Adam had to use the restroom when I was lining up to pay. As soon as he left the store, the music got turned on to be extremely loud. The girl at the head of the line was taking a very long time, so by the time Adam came back, i was still in the same position in line. After about 15 minutes, I was finally at the register. But then the girl screws up, and had to do a return and then a payment again. By the time we finally got out of the store, we thought we were in a different world. It was like that scene from Shawshank Redemtion when the dude crawled out of the tunnel into the light, I swear. We went into Banana Republic next and I saw Adam carrying the bag in his arms and realized that the handle had broken and he didn't tell me because he did not want to go back to the store. That made me laugh pretty hard. Anyway, I volunteered to go in myself and switched the bag.

Did I like the coat when I got home, you might ask? Yeah, it was alright, tho i think the fit is a little big. The XS size that the store was sold out of is on the website though, but plus $10 shipping, so we may still have to go back to that store to return the one I got. Sorry Adam!!

Btw, note the blinds at the NYC 5th Ave Flagship store in the first image. Why do they bother having windows?! I wonder if the blinds ever get used...

Adam thinks that the marketing scheme for the A&F chains and subsidiaries work because their clothes actually look nice. I beg to differ, although I have no idea why their marketing scheme works on the mass. Someone enlighten me?

Fall Fashion: Rain Boots??

As we all know, boots have been all the rage for a while now. I think it started with the knee-high boots, or as I recall what has been called hooker boots or Come F*** Me Boots; and then after a couple of years of all types going in and out of style, it went all the way down to ankle boots, which came back with a vengeance last year (in keeping with this whole 80s fashion that has been going on for too long now.) Oh, and not to mention, the Ugghlies, of which I am now an unfortunate owner (received as a gift...they are, however, as I reluctantly admit, very comfortable and warm.)

Come on, if you had gone to Australia, say, five years ago, you would have never thought those Ugghlies would sweep America off of its feet (hehehe). But it did, and it continues to. So if I were to tell you that these babies would come into fashion soon, you'd believe me right?

Okay, well I kid. No one I know in Toronto owns a pair of rain boots, we hardly own umbrellas. The reality is, we will never need a pair (whereas Ugghlies are pretty warm for the harsh winters there.) There is this thing called "car", which I have been pretty deprived off since I left Toronto, that replaces umbrellas and rain boots. I know it rained all summer in Toronto this year, and last year as well, but if you had to walk for a couple of blocks in the rain, the well-maintained roads (seriously, no joke) and drainage system usually will not allow water puddles or mud soak your feet or splash on you. Even in the winter, the slush is nicely shovelled to the side without problems. When we think of rain boots, we think of these:

But alas, what most of us probably failed to realize is that there are lesser places in the world that does rain all the time, where the roads are horribly planned, the drainage system sucks, the snow melts into slush and freezes again back and forth, and the roads are just not shovelled. One of these lesser places is named Boston.

As summer comes into an end and the leaves turn nicely red, yellow, and orange, rain befalls Boston, and mud befalls on us. The FIRST day I got to Boston, I had the fortunate experience of walking to the T (the Bostonian name for their public transit system) on a dirt path along the highway in the rain from home. My shoes did not look pretty. I noticed a girl on the T, however, wearing rain boots and I thought to myself, "What a great idea! I'm going to get me a pair!!" Funny thing was, I thought finding a pair of nice looking rain boots would be hard, but little did I know, rain boots are fall necessities not just in Britain, but also in Boston. Almost every store that sells shoes in Boston, sell rain boots ...even Aldo (Did anyone else know that Aldo sells rain boots?)

Apparently, rain boots, sometimes used interchangeably with Wellies (supposed to go up to your knees), or Waders (supposed to go up to your chest), or galoshes (supposed to cover your shoes), is a part of the fall fashion here in Boston. Here are some fashionable ones:

Which ones did I get? Hunter Wellington Boots in black, with red Wellie Socks for lining and cuff!!

FYI: Hunter’s Wellington boots are actually famous for its durability, comfort and performance... Hunter caters to all sorts of people from farmers to rock stars to the royalty [my box tells me it's appointed by the Queen and Duke of Edinburgh!]

*EDIT: Apparently, Eldon says Hunter boots are popular in Toronto. I ran a google search on "hunter boots toronto" and found a blog entry from last year that talked about it. According to this girl, you can find hunter boots at approximate four locations in Toronto...they are about as mainstream as Salvatore Ferragamo handbags!

Microblogging

I've been really busy. I don't want to say that I'm gonna be giving up on blogging, but it's going to be a while before I can sit down and write something longer than 140 characters. Why 140 you ask? Because that's the max number of characters Twitter allows you to have. For those of you who have not noticed, I have managed to place a Twitter Gadget on the sidebar for quite a while now, under the title "That's what she said" (I don't even like the Office). Anyway, I've been microblogging nowadays in replacement. You don't need to get twitter to follow it but say hi if you have it :)

Robert Pattinson is too funny

Twilight star's amazing powers of boredom

In the 2008 vampire romance Twilight, Robert Pattinson's character had the ability to rip people to shreds with his teeth. In real-life, the actor has a much more mundane talent.
Pattinson, 22, told Creme magazine that he managed to shake off one of his many obsessive fans simply by being a bore.
"I had a stalker while filming a movie in Spain," Pattinson said. "She stood outside of my apartment every day for weeks — all day, every day. I was so bored and lonely that I went out and had dinner with her."
It was at this point that Pattinson, who's currently preparing to start shooting the Twilight sequel New Moon, unleashed his powers of boredom on the unsuspecting stalker.
"I just complained about everything in my life and she never came back," he said. "People get bored of me in, like, two minutes

Source: http://www.yourmovies.com.au/news/?i=154519&action=news&rss=yes

I think I'm going to follow him online from now on cuz he's so funny

Twilight: Part Deux

Last September, I wrote about my thoughts on the book Twilight,claiming it was a piece of badly-written fanfic. One would think that if I really meant what I said, I would not go and buy the second book of that series. Oh, but I did. One day in December, I was feeling miserable. So while waiting for Adam to pick me up after work, I went into Chapters and asked the salesperson where they store the second book for the series. "New Moon?" the very nice, seemingly non-judgmental dude asked me. "Umm...sure..the second one." I paid my $12 after waiting in a long line and met up with Adam. To be fair, I read somewhere that the second one was the best of the series. I was lied to.

Honestly, I have no right to criticize this book, since it was my choice to buy it (I might harbour a subconscious love for trashy novels?), so I'll stop at conveying to you about the fact that I skipped literally half of the pages in the book and wanted to kill myself every time the main character of the story referred to herself as Juliet and to her perfect Vampire boyfriend as Romeo.

And since the third book has not been published in paperback yet, I've caught myself looking at the strategically placed sale signs for the hardcover books whenever I'm in Wal-Mart. I have will power dammit!!! And then I had dinner at Rita's last Thursday, who generously lent me her copy of the third book, telling me that this is actually the best one of the series. I finished the book in a day, and she didn't lie to me. Bad writing aside, Eclipse, as I learned the name from Rita that night, is actually better than the previous book (which doesn't really say much).

So Rita has kindly offered to lend me the fourth book, which I'll probably end up reading even though I know I should not. To redeem myself of this guilty pleasure, I offer you guys some funny critiques of the series.

• CRACKED.com points out exactly what is wrong with the series, with a sense of humour. This is honestly a good read.

• Robert Pattinson, the dude who actually plays Edward in the movie series, tells E-online how he doesn't understand why people like the book. He is also "convinced that Stephanie [Meyer] is convinced that she is Bella and it was a book that wasn't supposed to be published and reading her..uh..sorta sexual fantasy [...] This woman is mad [...] and she's in love with her fictional creation."

• Again, Pattinson in another interview called Edward a "two dimensional blob" and he can't understand why Edward behaves the way he does. Apparently he also said something like, "when you read the book, it's like 'Edward Cullen was so beautiful I creamed myself.' I mean every line is like that." But I couldn't finish watching the entire interview. I have a new respect for the dude.

The thing is, if you think about it, I'm probably not the only one with this guilty pleasure, with all these crazy critiques of the series going around.

What a lil Brat(d)?

I was unfortunately quite busy on Sunday doing some studying and could not make it in front of the TV for the 2009 81st Annual Oscars! So after doing much searching for the last couple of days, I was finally able to stream it on Need Movies. It was a really awesome show, probably the best one I've ever seen, so it's worth watching.


The reasons I'm posting about this is to:

• Let people know that there's a link that hasn't been taken down yet (at the moment I've posted this).
  

and


• Show what a possible brat Brad Pitt was at the awards ceremony when Kate Winslet was announced to be best actress and not Angelina Jolie.
  

Everyone stands up for a standing ovation for Kate Winslet, including Angelina Jolie, but Brad Pitt does not (See Part 12 of the link I gave out).

1. Angelina tells him to stand up too.
2. About ten seconds later, he finally does.
3. Kate Winslet walks right by him since he's got the aisle seat at the front.

Some theories:

• He doesn't like Kate Winslet because she forgot Jolie's name during her Golden Globe acceptance speech
• He had something on his leg/his leg was asleep and couldn't stand up right away.
• He's upset that Angelina Jolie didn't win and supports her by not standing up.
  
• He thinks Kate Winslet didn't deserve the Oscars/performance wasn't that good.

You can decide.

___________

On another note, I almost forgot, my favourite dresses:
Marisa Tomei's Versace Pleated dress (If you look carefully, the pleats are done so elaborately and intricately) and Heidi Klum's Roland Mouret fiery red origami dress. She wore a dress of the same colour last year which I liked a lot better, but this year's nice dresses were quite limited. Nothing memorable like Halle Berry's dress the year she won best actress or Gwenyth Paltrow's RL pink dress when she won.

White was apparently the colour this year, surprisingly a lot of people came with silvery white, beige white, barly any color that looks like white. Needless to say, the show itself was a lot better than fashion this year. I blame it on skinny jeans, Ugg(lies), TNA, hoods with the fur, and lululemon pants. Ugg(h)!

The Real Destiny Problem

I got a Facebook group invite from Adam this afternoon to join the group COCKROACH special at DESTINY TEA AND CAFE LOUNGE.

There are a few things that I want to comment on about this situation so I'm going to section them, since I am a control freak.

Summary
The story, in short, is that a girl went to Destiny Tea and Cafe, the location at Silverstar and found two small cockroaches in her drink. The waitress told her the manager was not in and was only going to take off 13% off the bill (i.e., no tax). The customer felt that she should not be still charged her for the drink and when that didn't happen, she went around showing people the cockroach. She asked to talk to the manager to no avail and started a Facebook group. The next day, the manager got back to her and after finding out she was a student, 21 years old, and does not speak Mandarin/Cantonese, the manager refused to speak to her because she was "immature." The manager asked to speak to someone who does speak Chinese. When the girl got her friend to call back, the manager told the friend that she'd call him back in 10 minutes but never did. After the customer called back Destiny a few times, the manager threatened her with legal action if she does not take her Facebook group down.

The story has now been cross-posted at RFD, CLUBRSX, and even BlogTo. I decided not to post photos since I don't want to see cockroach pictures on my blog, but any of the links I provided in the post will give you plenty graphics.

The Crux of the Problem
I think for the most part, it's evident that the crux of the problem is not the fact that there are cockroaches in her drink. If this was the issue, she could have filed a formal complain rather than start a Facebook group. Plus, it is not like any of us never experienced having bugs in our food. Personally I've found bugs in my food at a number of restaurants but I never felt the need to escalate the situation. I call the server over, s/he sees the bug and s/he apologizes, takes the food off the bill and/or replaces it. Sometimes if the store has a good policy, it will compensate (with a coupon/new dish/give the entire meal for free, etc.). The problem began with the server not treating the issue properly because she felt that she did not have the authority. But of course it didn't help when the customer walked around showing ppl the cockroach. The customer was being a bitch but if she had just offered to take it off the bill, all of this might have been resolved. Nevertheless, the question is, was it fair for the customer to start the Facebook group at that point? Should she have waited to contact management first before escalating the situation publicly? I think so.

• From a pragmatic standpoint, the situation might have worked out better for her.
• From a fairness standpoint, the place should be given a chance to clean up their management. What happened did not deserve a publicity stunt.
  
• From a realistic standpoint, however, if i were the customer, i would not have wanted to go through the redtape to get to the management and starting a Facebook group would have been the easier solution.

The reality is, sometimes the mass can have too much power and not all of us have the ability to constrain our power, especially if you are in the situation. Personally, as an observer, I would not have joined the Facebook group at that point. I would not have publicly supported her. However, implicitly, it is possible for me have taken a note of the situation in my head and not go to that particular location.


Agism, Classism, Racism, and Culture
What made me feel really upset and decided to join this group was the way in which the manager did handle the situation. The fact that she asked for the customer's age and class and ethnicity and then deemed her unworthy of her attention. Of course, it is a possibility that the customer might have interpreted things wrongly and perhaps the original intention was not discrimination but I think it is very likely that it did happen. It is not unheard of for Asians to discriminate people based on age, class, and race, especially because the customer's name sounds brown/middle eastern. The only thing understandable about it is that it happens in their culture, but that does not justify the manager's action. (I have an urge to add that especially because she is in Canada, but I do not wish to discriminate cultures. Albeit her actions might have been a lot more understandable were she in Asia, it should still not be allowed to happen anywhere). What the manager did was flat out discriminating. Nothing justifies that.

Even if some of the discrimination issues were not true (I think the age part is for sure true). However, I feel that for the problem to have escalated to this level, management should apologize regardless.

The Escalation
It begins at the low level, the waitress was rude and did not know what to do. Blame it on the next level, the manager. She should have handled the situation better and then taught the employee what to do. But she didn't. Instead, she discriminated and pointed fingers. She sounds uneducated and rude. Discrimination aside, she threatened for legal action. Are you kidding? Well, I hope so, I hope she was just bluffing, though a very dumb bluff. Nevertheless, the question is, has this situation escalated to the upper managements at Destiny? Did the dumb manager contact someone who had more authority before she threatened about legal action? Because if she did, then the upper management needs some lessons in business management.

• First of all, whoever came up with the legal actions should know that for the company to sue for libel, as the plaintiff, the onus is on them in civil court, not beyond a reasonable doubt, but based on the balance of probabilities that the customer was lying. There is no way they can prove that, especially not with the graphic pictures. Unless they can find some proof for a motive for that girl to be lying, they are pretty screwed. The only they can possibility sue for was their act of discrimination, but I'm not really sure how they can accomplish. Most that can happen is the judge telling the defendent to take off the part about discrimination, but the cockroach part is already a bust on the company's rep.
  
• Secondly, as a business, why would you escalate something so small publically? Are you out of your mind? As a corporation that owns over 7 entities, each of them with several stores in various locations, do you really want the pictures of cockroaches in your food to to go even more public? Why don't you want to settle this privately, apologize to the girl and give her a coupon or something. It sounds like she just wants some justice, she doesn't even seem to care for compensation. By threatening legal action, this stuff is going to go on television and you are going to pay for a lot more than an apology and 15% off VIP card.

Bad Management
The fact that this situation as gone this far already shows that the management at the upper level needs to pay more attention to their stores. My family actually knows some upper management people/investors of Destiny. It is a Taiwanese company and most of their upper management is Taiwanese. I would like to imagine that at least one of them would deal with it before it blows up even further; however, it is not unlike the culture of the company to leave the little stuff for the little people (who may or may not be Taiwanese, this is not about our culture) until it gets to the point of no return. That, is the crux of Destiny's management problem. The company is highly unstructured. It is made up of a large number of investors who takes ownership over the stores in which they invested the most. It is a chained entity managed informally like a franchise. Each investor is only interested in their own store but if one store is managed badly, they all go down. Management structure aside, each of the investors still needs to train their staff, manage their staff, and learn that business begins at the customer service. Until then, there is only going to be more problems. It's like a dominoes effect, one person starts the trend, then they all do. Hopefully, Destiny will learn from this.

My Broken Heart

My dad and my brother have always been fans but I've never really followed basketball. I recall going to my first rap's game in high school because I ran into Celane on the bus who had an extra ticket and ditched my friends with whom I was supposed to go to the movies. I don't even remember who we were playing and what went on at the game since I only went because I've never been to a basketball game.

When I did start sort of started to follow basketball, it's always been a ride on the bandwagon. I bought a game package for someone over Christmas two years ago and I went to one of the games. Later that year, helping Chet scalp playoff tickets with Andrea earned us a free game at the playoffs. I did follow the rest of that series, which we ended up losing to the Nets in round 1. I watched the playoff games with everyone last year too.

I think this year is the only year that I've started following the Raptor's since the beginning of the season. I sat through most of the games with Adam, watching as we win and lose. I went to the the game against the Heat last wknd at the ACC and it was so frustrating to watch a game with us leading in double-digits then having the Heat take the lead. Fortunately, we ended up winning that game. Today's game was even more frustrating. Fifteen points lead and then we went overttime and LOST the game? I hate the Nets. I really do. And the Raptors has really got to stop teasing me like this.

But melodrama aside, which is really not my point for this post and is taking me really long to convey, what I want to say, actually, is how much i hate getting emotionally attached to a sports team. Right now, I have been following the Raps not only because they are the Toronto team, but also because I actually really love watching most of the players on the team (alright...mainly the latest starting lineup). But like, what I mean is, when I'm watching the game, I get excited when Bosh makes a good play, when Parker steals a ball, when O'Neal rebounds, Calderon makes a good pass...you get the point..., but I also know that, regardless how the season is going to end, the team is most likely not going to stay the same. I find it difficult to understand how Adam can follow Ford and call him his favourite pointguard but then completely not following up on him after he gets traded. How do you negotiate your identification with a team vs. your attachment to a player?

I understand why ppl like Jordan regardless of the team he's on (because of his ability to play). I can also understand why ppl still dislike Carter even though he's still a good player (because his ethics sucks). But what i dont understand is how you can like a player on a team you also like and then not like the same player after he gets traded. And if your emotional attachment lies with the team, then how do you explain the large number of people who stop supporting a team because it has horrible players that are constantly getting traded? I know everyone has different reasons for who and what they support. Harvey says "you should have a criteria for liking a team" and that he "like[s] teams that play basketball the right way", which denotes that he likes basketball for the sake of the game itself, but you know, that seem to also connote that he likes a team when they plays well, which takes away the whole aspect of "loyalty". But he's gonna be a lawyer soon, so what more can you expect?

At any rate, although I was never an advocate for blind loyalty, I think for the time being, I will continue to follow the Raptors even though Harvey's says my "emotional attachment has been misplaced". I'm from Toronto and I think we have some great players on the team. There. Leave me alone. And stop breaking my heart Raptor's.

ETA: Tal found this--Rules for being a true fan, scroll down to loyalty (rules 18 and 19)

That New Reality Show

Before I left the house today, Adam was channel surfing and Paris Hilton's face flashed before me as the channels were changing.
"Wait!" I called out, "was that Paris Hilton??"
"Yeah..."
"Whoa, she looks a lot better than she used to, go back go back, I wanna see!"
So Adam turns back to the channel and I find a significantly more refined-looking Paris Hilton sitting on a throne-like seat and Adam informs me that Elvin, one of our roommates, also said the same thing about her looking better.
"Must be plastic surgery," I announced out loud, "didn't she, like, disappear for a while? Probably waiting for her surgery to heal"

The shot pans to the rest of the scene and I see a bunch of girls sitting across from her throne.
"Umm..." I said hesitantly, "is this the new show where she's picking a new best friend?"
And to my horror, Paris Hilton begins scrutinizing each girl the way they do on American Idol and The Apprentice and decides on the girl that's not going to make the cut as her best friend. After the girl gets eliminated, she gets the traditional last scene talking about her experiences of being on the show with Hilton. As the show comes to a close, Hilton lies sideways on one of those 19thC chairbed things and announces to the world how hard it is to find a new best friend.

Are
You
Kidding
Me
??????????

I felt my blood pressure rising as I stormed out of the house in the rain. How bad is reality show getting these days??? When I first heard of the show, I thought it was going to be Paris Hilton going off to random places in the world in search of a new girl to be her best friend; still dumb, but not an exploitation of human weakness and low self-esteem. Are you seriously telling me that you are making a show with a bunch of low self-esteem girls vying for a social validation by Ms. Paris Hilton? What kind of message are you sending to the public?

The scene that especially angered me was when Hilton decided to provide a public insight about how hard it is to find a best friend. No, no, no. No you did not. Don't go around pretending that this show is insightful and observational about the human condition. NO. The public is not stupid, we know how hard it is to find someone who really gets you. But. that's. not. how. you. make. friends. What type of value are placing on the word "friendship"? Is a friend someone who worships you on a throne and does whatever they can to please you?

A normal human process of making friends is a negotiation between social validation and individualization. People do things to please their friends in order seek validation. In turn, they are socialized to adhere to social norms. But at the same time, if your friends can't accept you for who you are when you are not violating social standards then you stick your back up and you find new friends. I know that not everyone is capable of doing it, but is this not the goal of social development? Is society not working towards helping people increase their self-esteem so that they are confident enough to say no? What type of behaviour are you condoning by putting this on TV? Are you saying that it's okay to bitch fight in order to get the attention of a popular and rich girl?

I HATE REALITY SHOWS and this has got to be one of the worst ones I've ever seen. Ironically, Adam tells me that there are worse ones out there. Have you heard about the show Parental Control? The premise is simple: Parents hate the girlfriend of the son, so parents pick three girls they like and send their son out to date them. Fine, I get that. But making the girlfriend sit with the parents and watch the dates live on TV while the boyfriend is making out with the girls? And then the show is about the girl and the parents fighting and swearing at each other? WTF???

I hate reality shows for that very reason. The exploitation of human feelings. This is not okay. Stuff like Temptation Island when you separate a couple, put one on an island with a bunch of peopel to seduce the person...WHY? What is the goal you are achieving? Under normal circumstance, a man may not cheat on his girlfriend, but if you are to place him on an island with hot girls trying to take off his pants everyday for a month, he most likely will cave. Don't give me the BS that you are testing his loyalty because placing someone under an extreme circumstance like that does not help with his development as a human being nor his relationship. It is absolutely ridiculous.

Human beings are not toys. Their feelings are not toys. You can argue that these people are consenting to be a part of the show so it's their own fault, but I cannot agree. There are people out there with low self-esteem. There are people out there who needs money. There are people out there who are not ethically intact. But as another human being that's a part of society, we are not there to watch them suffer and toy with their minds, we should be there to help them and care about them. And even if you don't want to care about them, you can at least leave them alone.

Note that I am not saying we are better than these people on the reality shows. I believe that they are fine on their own if there were not the existence of these horrendous shows seducing them towards the road of sins and stupidity. By watching these shows and creating these shows, you are the ones calling them stupid and that you think you are better than them. That is not okay.

These shows destruct humanity.

Perhaps my views are left-winged and that I am looking at this from the standpoint of protecting society, but I believe that humanity is important for our wellbeing and that I believe we should care about each other.

As a disclaimer, I do admit that my knowledge of reality shows are limited as I refuse to participate in this unethical phenomenon. I know there are reality shows that are out there which are more helpful than destructive. But seriously, this nonsense with things like My New BFF and Temptation Island has got to stop. We simply should not and cannot sink any lower.

And please, Paris Hilton, for the love of human beings, go away.

My first ever hockey game!

I've always said that one of my goals in life is to attend a hockey game (as a joke since they are so hard to get in Toronto) but it worked out that I finally go to go to my first hockey game ever while I was in Columbus.


The Columbus Blue Jackets were playing against the Vancouver Canucks last Tuesday and the Nationwide Arena was just across the street from our hotel. My co-worker and I decided to go to the game after the conference reception and we got so lucky!While we were buying tickets, the ushers called me over and gave me a free $57 dollar ticket (lower bowl!!) so we ended up buying another $57 ticket and split the cost.

The game was really really good. We got in the arena in the middle of 2nd period and canucks were losing to the blue jackets 2:1 and the bluejackets scored another goal before 2nd period ended. Although the seats did not fully sell out, it looked about 80% filled and the crowd were really good fans. Yhey were very enthusiastic which makes everything a lot of fun. Interestingly, we were sitting next to a big group of Canuck fans holding a huge flag so we were cheering with them!
The last period was the best part, the canucks came back strong scoring a goal in the first few minutes! Towards the end of the game, they were on power play and they handled the puck extremely well. For a long time they were passing it to each other in the offensive zone and taking shots continuously. Unfortunately, the goalie was too good and they never scored.
Last two minutes of the game, the canucks coach actually took the goalie off the game and added an extra player in hopes of pulling the score even. but last 30 seconds, the blue jackets scored on their empty net.
exciting, huh?

Funniest thing, however, was the road closure.

I didn't know whether going to this hockey game would satiate me for good but it looks like it definitely didn't. I would love it if I can go to a hockey game one day.