Tuesday, March 29, 2011

Politically Incorrect

This conversation made my day

me: ok, i need a HUGE favour lol
there's a girl on craigslist giving away moving boxes
i was wondering if its possible for u to help me out :D
so i have boxes for boston :P
and the money i save from the boxes can be many bags of kettle chips

H: u can use my car if that's good with u
u can buy me a drink ;)

me: lol ok

H: i want a bottle of cristal

me: um

H: though the economics of that might not work out for u anymore

me: lol i was trying to figure that one out too
how many boxes can i get with a bottle of cristal?

H: probably a small workshop of cambodians building u boxes

me: hahahahahahahaha i'm blogging that

Saturday, March 26, 2011

Easy Peasy on the Fifth

I'm not a clubber.
I remember in the first two years of undergrad, I went quite often, but I use the word "often" loosely. While everyone went to Tonic weekly in first year, and Afterlife weekly in second year, I would venture to say that I went on average of once a month. And then i went out with mike and we went clubbing maybe four times throughout our two-year relationship. The three single years between the two relationships, I could probably count with one hand how many times i went clubbing.

Below is evidence of how uncultivated i am with the "club scene." Whatever that i'm listing below is probably old news for most people.

Things I learned at Easy last night:
  • The crowd hasn't changed since the last time i was there (two years ago); they just aged
  • The crowd also hasn't changed since the last time I was dragged to another club (three weeks ago) because I saw too many familiar strangers from the other night.
  • There will not be a single night you go to Easy and you won't know at least 1/3rd of the crowd.
    • This time around, I ran into people i haven't seen from hs for 10 years, and people i haven't seen from elementary for 15 years
    • Apparently this club is a graveyard for ex-s.o.'s. You will likely meet at least two people you've dated in the past on any particular night. Thankfully none of my exes are now in toronto.
  • The aggressiveness of men correlates to the lateness of the night. By the time the lights turn on, guys will start to talk to any girl that doesn't look like they're going home with someone (even if they're in mid-conversation with another guy)
  • I used to think that if you go to a club and you're with guys, other guys will leave you alone. Alas that is not (or no longer?) the case, apparently they are now able to detect the difference between a girl going there with a guy, and a girl going there with someone they're seeing.
  • Don't leave a tab opened at the bar because you'll come back with a bill that makes you wish you bought that shirt you really wanted but couldn't afford from [insert expensive brand] instead
  • The bouncers and bartenders are actually really nice
  • I'm just not made for clubs.

Wednesday, March 23, 2011

The guy who never compliments

Andrew after I got off the phone with my mom: "Man I hate China Mandarin"
Me: "uh....thank you? I'll take that as a compliment...?"

The closest he will ever get to giving a compliment.

Thursday, March 17, 2011


Lynn: I got a tattoo!!!
Justin: WTH?! Are you rebelling or something?
Lynn: Against what??
Justin: I dunno...the world? ...your age?

Tuesday, March 15, 2011


The thing with this tattoo is how "freeing" it makes me feel.

Not so much liberation as much as just a pure sense of freedom. The ability to have that choice with your own body. The fact that it is yours and that it's yours only, to decide what goes on it, stays on it--or not.

It is mine, and purely mine. And it will never belong to another person.

I like having choices, even if I don't end up exercising them.
Fundamentally, humans are made of free will. And without choices, there would be no free will.

Sometimes, to keep me happy, all you need to do is tell me I have that choice, without any conditions, even if you don't want me to make that choice

....and I will likely not make that choice, happily. All I need to know is that I have it.

Monday, March 14, 2011

Getting Ready for Dirty Thirty

H: is this u trying to wrangle an LV bag out of me?
L: how do you think i get all my stuff :P
H: hahhaa... i still have no idea
L: lol
H: incredibly low standards? :P
L: hahaha....btw, i have no love for lv...i have yet to find a 2k bag i really want
H: good for u...u can use 2k for a lot more... like travelling...haha i don't get bags
L: in a way i kinda dont either.. i mean i like bags but i havent found one to me will be worth 2k cuz to me 2k bag will have to last forever, never go out of fashion, and i wont ever be bored of it, which is impossible
H: those are difficult criteria to meet
L: lol yeah, because 2k is a lot of money!
H: i don't know if anything in this world could ever meet that
L: you know what im gonan do? im gonna start a handbag fund. if i put 100 dollars aside a month in two years i'll be able to get something thats appx 2400
H: hhaha u could do it. i'd even elicit outside donors..start an awareness campaign
L: what if i just put that 100 dollars in a jar every month?
H: do u even want a handbag? u don't seem like the handbag kinda girl
L: well i keep talking about it like i talk about getting a tattoo...ive been saying for so long i want *one*....i have a lot of handbags tho
H: hahah what is this? lynn impulse era
L: hahaha i know everything i've deprived myself of doing, im gonan do it all at once
H: i feel like ur gonna get tattooed, jump out of a plane, and sew a handbag at the same time...take it easy, lol...ur not on ur death bed :)
L: lol...well i have a two year plan for my handbag!
H: i agree with the plan
L: although 100 is a lot a month... maybe i can do a three year plan
H: a nice 30th bday present for urself
L: lol wooo sounds like a plan!! although i already missed two months..

Monday, March 7, 2011

Coldplay - Viva La Vida

I used to rule the world
Seas would rise when I gave the word
Now in the morning I sleep alone
Sweep the streets I used to own

I used to roll the dice
Feel the fear in my enemy's eyes
Listen as the crowd would sing
"Now the old king is dead! Long live the king!"

One minute I held the key
Next the walls were closed on me
And I discovered that my castles stand
Upon pillars of salt and pillars of sand

I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can't explain
Once you go there was never
Never an honest word
And that was when I ruled the world

It was the wicked and wild wind
Blew down the doors to let me in
Shattered windows and the sound of drums
People couldn't believe what I'd become

Revolutionaries wait
For my head on a silver plate
Just a puppet on a lonely string
Oh who would ever want to be king?

I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can't explain
I know Saint Peter won't call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

I hear Jerusalem bells a ringing
Roman Cavalry choirs are singing
Be my mirror, my sword and shield
My missionaries in a foreign field

For some reason I can't explain
I know Saint Peter won't call my name
Never an honest word
But that was when I ruled the world

Saturday, March 5, 2011

Letters from my miserable rainy day

Dear UPS @ 15 Toronto Street: Why would you close on a Saturday when you are supposed to be open, and notify me with a hand-written sign to tell me you're closed today after I get there?

Dear UPS @ 20 Richmond Street W: Why would you tell the website you're there, when you're really not?

Dear UPS @ 20 Dundas West: First, you are not at 20 Dundas West, in fact, you are in the Atrium at Bay, hidden at the bottom floor behind the bathroom. How do you expect people to find you.

Dear UPS: You should have dropboxes that fit boxes. A computer is not that big, why can't it fit?

Dear World: I know i've probably wronged you in some way, but can you at least let me know when the misery is going to end?

Thursday, March 3, 2011

Jon Rafman

LH: Does the internet subvert the idea of a ‘master narrative’?

JR: No, I think the master narrative was subverted way before the internet became popular. I think it had more to do with the failure of major ideologies.

But I also think that we live in one world and we are not so different from one another, and that a universal discourse exists. If I experience fragmentation due to being overwhelmed with data, it may well represent contemporary reality and consciousness. Perhaps our subjectivity changes over time, but it is ultimately part of our shared human history. We are narrative creatures. No matter what, we will create stories that have patterns and arcs and consist of a series of events that can be recounted.